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Worst case

8:15 clock. After I lay awake almost since 6:00 clock, with trembling hands I called again in the infertility clinic. But it was as feared. The worst case occurred. Unfortunately they had no good news for me it has no egg can be fertilized.

Now again the thoughts going through my head ... Why is that? Am I too old? Are my Eierchen just too bad?

I used to naively always thought that an ICSI if the sperm is injected directly into the egg, the egg is almost zangsbefruchtet. This resulted in my fantasy world that it would then come to a fertilization rate of
100%.

I read yesterday, however, that not the case. Even with the ICSI fertilization rate is only about 70% - in normal case. If the rate is worse, the poor are the eggs or sperm quality.

And then it occurred to me: Did my Treasury in recent weeks at all zinc taken? Where the zinc is all about. I'll have to ask. The last test he had taken at least from time to zinc and as we had at least a fertilization rate of 25%.

We now have only one sponsored by the health insurance experiment. One! Then it gets really expensive, we should go do. I write the same time, a memory piece of paper with "zinc", so I think of it in the next round.

And now my body needs probably take a break. The hormones make sure that weight is jojo. And a look in the mirror tells me that the Jojo rises above all to the top. What an awful feeling. Can anyone even forwards by the Clock? So on March 2011?

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and neither one thing nor

Today I was able to clock 13.00 to call in the hospital. I was mega excited and my hands were shaking. I felt really bad.

I had, of course, after the disappointment that this time there were only three eggs, made all sorts of thoughts. Worst case and best case then. Worst case would be if none of the eggs can be fertilized. Best case would be if all the eggs can be fertilized and transferred one, the rest frozen.

And I had been wondering why were in increasing the dose Menogon not matured oocytes. But perhaps more depending on the amount from the woman. Perhaps increased by increasing the dose Menogon only the quality and maturity of the eggs? So I was hoping that this time the fertilization rate is higher, and fertilize every three or at least two eggs left.

13.00 clock. I choose to shaky hands the numbers. An answering machine informs me that all lines were busy.

13.05 clock. I choose again with trembling hands the number. I get told that it was still unclear, I should call tomorrow at 8.15 clock again. The biologist is looking at this again later on.

Okay, with this statement, I did not expect. But at least it's not worst case. This makes driving me nuts! So I find out tomorrow whether the insemination worked. How should I keep only hope?

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A little disappointed

Today was again puncture. And although I have injected this time from the beginning a higher dose, there are now only three Eierchen. The last time there were four.

time had another medical service in the OR. And somehow I felt that the deal is not so gentle with me as the doctor last time, but light bleeding are probably normal.

Another woman has to leave without anesthesia puncture. But she said that it would not have been bad. But I was really happy as I have been sent to the realm of dreams. Then it was me no matter which doctor is on duty.

Now I hope that can be fertilized at least good. Last time, only one egg out of four was little. Tomorrow I'll call and find out if I can on Saturday to transfer ...

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dialogue

Me: "Make me a baby!"

He: "But I am not responsible."